Tag: #help

Posted in #life

Where do I fit in my kids pre-teen/teen world?

Posted on by Snippetsofmylife

Our daughter is turning 12 in a few weeks.  Last night we were looking through videos and spending some precious time reminiscing.  There she was in front of the camera ….needing mom and dad and wanting to show and share everything with us.  As she enters her into the last year of being a “pre-teen” things are starting to change.

Entering this new life chapter…Where do I fit? Or her dad?  Well, in my opinion, I believe that pre-teens and teens need us a parents now more than ever!  How they may need us is what changes.  So, even though they may want more space or more freedom, that doesn’t lessen our role as parents.

Tips?

  • shift your focus from over managing your child’s schedule
  • provide advice and supervision
  • have high, but realistic  expectations
  • know their friends
  • establishing a special period of one-on-one time once or twice a week that you spend with your tween, where you’re providing undivided attention
  • start conversations surrounding hard or uncomfortable topics
  • hold firm with consequences

If your child get caught getting into trouble:

  • Call them out if they are caught in a lie
  • Address misbehavior
  • Teach them to make amends if another person who was affected
  • Use natural consequences (ex:  if caught sneaking the cell phone…then the cell phone is off-limits for a period of time)
  • let them know the sneaky behavior is not justified and goes against your house rules
  • Remove emotion and stay calm

“Adolescence is a period of rapid changes.  Between the ages of 12 and 17, for example, a parent ages as much as 20 years.” – Author Unknown

 

Posted in #life, Uncategorized

I am not an expert, but try to play one in real life

Posted on by Snippetsofmylife

One look around and you will find experts everywhere.  They seem to pop up over night.  Within 2 minutes on the internet, I could find people claiming to be experts in: nutrition, exercise, fashion, house cleaning, interior design, child care, elder care, pets, marriage, childhood, and addiction.   The question is: what really makes someone an expert?  Is it experience?  Education?  Success?  How do you weed out true experts from the people pretending to be one..especially on-line?

Looking at an “expert” purely in terms of a definition, it would be a person with a high degree of skill in or knowledge of a certain subject  or field.  Here are some great guidelines from Daniel Newman via Forbes magazine:

  • Consider the source
  • Check the facts
  • Search or Nimble the author

To take it even further, the Harvard Business Review writes that a real expertise must pass three tests. First,  performance must be consistently superior to that of the expert’s peers. Second, real expertise produces concrete results. Finally, true expertise can be replicated and measured in the lab.

My additional tips:

  • Use common sense.  Just content writing doesn’t make someone an expert.
  • Just because something is on the internet does NOT make the information true.
  • It’s OK to admit you are an amateur…one that is eager to learn and grow.

In today’s world it is really hard to weed through the garbage.  We are all searching for authentic information that will provide the best outcome for us.  Keep the above mentioned things in mind as you scan through social media and the internet in search for the latest information on a topic.  Hopefully, it will save you from wasting your time.

“Owning a drone does not a pilot make.” ― Alex Morritt

“All great achievements require time.” – Maya Angelou